Music I want my kids to listen too.

A  bit of an emotional one tonight. When Grace, my beautiful baby girl, was 10 weeks old, my Mum died. She’d put up such a brave fight. When the doctors decided she had a matter of hours left, she went on to last nine days. It was the hardest nine days of my life. A few days before this, when Mum had just enough strength to know what was going on – to know that her brand new granddaughter was with her – to know that she was surrounded by family who love her, we had Grace christened in her hospice room. I look back at the christening photos that the nurse took,and Mum is truly beaming with pride. She is illuminated. I  wasn’t sure about having any of my kids christened but it brought her such absolute joy I will never regret it. I was with Mum constantly for those nine days, a camp bed set up on the floor, my husband and baby coming daily to visit. God bless children. Her little smiles and finger grasps kept us all going. She was my shining little light in a dark time. Mum passed away at two in the morning on January 24th last year whilst I held her hand and told her I loved her.

Then I went into overdrive. I sorted out her stuff, I rang funeral homes, I told people the news, I went hell for leather and never stopped to take a breath, let alone cry.

Then, one day, I was driving to the Reverend’s house to talk about the funeral. She’d been a good friend to my Mum, she’d performed Grace’s Christening, and I was meeting my brother there to discuss the eulogy. My husband had downloaded a few CD’s for me to listen to as it was a long drive, one of which was Mumford and Sons album Sign No More. Now I like them – I’m not a massive fan, and I’ve never seen them live, I just thought I’d check out the album. A track came on called Timshel. It totally disabled me. It was like it had been written especially for me, just for that exact time in my life. I had to pull over and the tears came. I wept my absolute heart out, for the loss of Mum, for my little girl never knowing her Nanny, for the awful strain of the past few weeks, and for myself.

How incredible that one song can have that effect on a human being.

When Grace old enough to understand – maybe even an adult, I’ll play her this song and tell her how important it is to me, and how important she was to her Nanny x 

“Music has the power to move a person between different realities: from a broken body into a soaring spirit, from a broken heart into the connection of shared love, from death into the memory and movement of life. Music has the power to touch the heart of a child with God.”
Dr. Deforia Lane
Music Therapist

 

 
 

The Day Mum met Grace x

 

Cold is the water
It freezes your already cold mind
Already cold, cold mind
And death is at your doorstep
And it will steal your innocence
But it will not steal your substance

But you are not alone in this
And you are not alone in this
As brothers we will stand and we'll hold your hand
Hold your hand

And you are the mother
The mother of your baby child
The one to whom you gave life
And you have your choices
And these are what make man great
His ladder to the stars

But you are not alone in this
And you are not alone in this
As brothers we will stand and we'll hold your hand
Hold your hand

But I will tell the night
And Whisper, "Lose your sight"
But I can move the mountains for you
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9 Comments

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9 responses to “Music I want my kids to listen too.

  1. Ah Minty you have me in tears again. What a lovely post, thanks for sharing it. I know it must’ve been hard but you should be proud of yourself. Give Grace a big kiss from me, Eva and Luka
    XxX

  2. Awww man, you’ve got me crying too! A beautiful post in every way,
    Love Jules x

  3. Thank you. Can’t quite belive I’ve shared it myself but glad I have. Will do a more light-hearted one next, promise – Music part 2! x

  4. Tears here too, very moving…. Brilliantly written.

  5. A beautiful post – your mum looked so happy in the photo. A memory to treasure for life. Thanks for sharing.

  6. tears, i’m in tears. love the photo…. beautiful post – would make her proud x

  7. A beautiful post, such a sad time for you. I dread the day I have to say goodbye to my Mum. The joy in your Mums face is so heartwarming x

  8. Tears again! So much of what you say resonates so strongly with me, one day I hope I’m so brave to put it all down as well

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