Dr Gibble and Miss Hyde.

Approaching two can be a lovely age. Cuteness is prevalent, affection is rife, and all is lovely, gibbly, toddly, wonderfulness . . . some of the time.

Then, a transformation can occur in the space of a nanosecond and it’s out with the cuteness, singing, and cuddles and in with the screaming (oh God the screaming) the throwing things, and the diva-ish, overly dramatic throw-myself-on-the-floor act. Today has been a perfect example. We went for a family walk with the dogs this morning. Grace sat in the little carrier on her Daddy’s back and greeted everyone and everything with a beaming smile, a wave and a “Hiya!” Passers by smile and go “aw” and we raise our eyes up to heaven in a comedy “what’s she like?!” kind of way whilst secretly bursting with pride that she’s being so adorable.

“Hiya tree. Hiya man. Hiya woof woof. Hiya car.” Wave wave wave. Beam beam beam.

She runs and toddles about on the field hugging every dog in sight, waving at every wonder of mother nature, stopping dead still and saying “Wow!” at a complete stranger throwing  a frisbee. She runs so fast downhill it makes her laugh and laugh to herself, and we are smothered in a plethora of cuddles and kisses when we get back home. ‘Yes’ thinks I as I put her down for her nap. ‘This is what it’s all about. This is Motherhood.’

40 minutes later and the sudden screaming that would indicate she’s awake would signify that it is, in fact, the end of the world. Her arms are outstretched for me when I go to pick her up, and yet when I do, I am bashed away and the screams become louder. “No no noooooooo!” she cries. No no no what? What exactly is she objecting to? We float downstairs on a sea of tears and she stomps to the kitchen cupboard. “BIC BIC? BIC BIC?” she sobs at me through the tears. Right. Can do. I open the tin and present her triumphantly with a biscuit. She takes it from me, but with another “No no NOOOOOOOOO” said biscuit is thrown violently to the floor and it all starts again. . .  “BIC BIC?”

What the hell? Was it the wrong kind of biscuit? I am not hearing her correctly? Should I have presented the biscuit on a silver frickin platter and curtseyed?

The crying subsides but the grumpy mood does not. Every game I try to play is apparently rubbish. Every snack is traumatic to her. The only things of interest are things she KNOWS she’s not allowed. The remote control, my specs, Daddy’s specs, the dog chew, and my fork from lunchtime are all forcibly removed from a clasped tight little fist. What inevitably follows is a very very loud, very very piercing scream.

 It’s horrible.

 We are enforcing a parental policy of “ignore the screams completely – she’ll soon get bored with them if we don’t react” but it’s hard. It’d be easier to ignore Susan Boyle singing full pelt in your kitchen. . .  whilst using a pneumatic drill with one hand and scratching her nails down a chalk board with the other. (Had a lot of it today, can you tell?)

Then it’s back from Miss Hyde to Dr Gibble again as she sits in her bath and pats the water singing “spashy spashy spashy” and giggling at Mummy blowing bubbles. All is forgiven.

Like butter wouldn't melt . . .


But seriously, the screaming . . . any ideas anyone?


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9 responses to “Dr Gibble and Miss Hyde.

  1. katherine brown

    Aaargh,I feel your pain……..I’m thinking finally I’m not alone in the world minty! My advice is,invest in some ‘you’ time,where it be pampering yourself,or when she’s knapping have time out for yourself! (not that you haven’t heared these patronizing words before mint)
    She’s 2,so I’m wondering if you concidered pre-school/nursery? In my honest opinion minty,she sounds well ready and don’t take offence but just as much as she loves you,she sounds so forward she maybe a little bored.x.isabel joined @ 2& I can honestly say it was a god send for the pair of us.
    She sounds like she wants to make her little way in the world and I bet she will thrive.
    The screaming will always be there,but she’ll burn so much energy x

  2. She does have two days at nursey when I’m at work. I think with the summer hols you may be right – she’s got a bit bored. Didn’t even think of that! Thanks Kath x

  3. I’m going through the same with my 2 year old daughter and started writing a post asking for any advice. I wish I had some for you. I try to ignore it as much as I can since it seems like her tantrums can feed off of the attention I give to them but I’m just not sure.

    It amazes me how my little girl can go from a sweet little girl to acting possessed and then back to a sweetie in just a few seconds. I’ve been calling it toddler PMS because I swear that’s what it’s like (http://bit.ly/gHn4NG ). Hugs to you. xx

  4. Ahh so i have all this to look forward to. Hopefully its just a phase that she will soon grow out of. But I feel your pain it must be sooo hard to ignore her screaming. Have you looked in to jo frosts book? gives some good hints and tips for terrible twos! I hope this phase ends soon x

  5. Mammasaurus

    ARGH! It’s like reading about my 3 yr old – and angel till she gets in the bath and its hair washing time then it’s screams galore!
    Today she has chickenpox starting and it’s ‘ noooo mummy I don’t want to tell you where I feel sore – if i do you’ll take me to the doctors!’

  6. Michelle

    So its not just us then? We refer to these episodes as having the devil visit for a while! Sometimes he visits just briefly, others he seems to get comfy for a week or more, then eventually peace reigns once more and we sigh, “Ah, the devil has left again – i wonder how long for this time?!” We seem to be going through a relatively calm period at the moment, but not for much longer I’m sure… I have supernanny’s latest book at the ready! 😉

  7. hahahaha!!! i have been there girl!!!
    what a hilarious post, sorry, i do too, feel your pain…!
    good luck with the terrible twos!!! xxxxx

    tams xxx

  8. I am going through the same Minty – we now refer to Ali as ‘the demon’ as he can be an angel one minute and a complete horror the next.

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