I should’ve known from the high-heeled trainers and inch thick make-up that this particular lady and I weren’t going to have a whole heap in common – least of all parenting skills. Life’s funny like that isn’t it? Just as you’re doubting your ability as a parent, some f**kwit Mum throws in her two penneth of moronic advice and makes you feel like Parent of the year. I know – I bang on about us Mums sticking together, not bitching, supporting each other, but this particular (lady?) has truly astounded/horrified me. Not only that, she had to NERVE to tell me how I should deal with my daughter. I’d best explain:
Shopping with the Giblet has become a bit of a chore. In fact it was getting pretty much impossible as it would seem to my daughter that a supermarket is a billion times more fun to run around in than any soft play centre or park. I only have to look away long enough to put something in the basket and Woooooooosh – she’s tearing off down the isle. The weekly shop with Grace is a constant struggle between riding out the screams and thrashing that ensue if I put her in the trolley seat, or letting her down and trying to persuade her to stay with Mummy and help. The latter is favoured as it is less demanding on the ear drums. Anyhoo – we got her a miniature, Gibby-sized shopping trolley from the toy shop. It even has a baby seat to put dolly in, and so far, it’s working a treat. Yesterday, she trundled happily along beside Mummy: her with her trolley and I with mine. She carefully selected her very own carrot and placed it in her trolley. She then went on to add a pack of baby wipes and a tin of spaghetti hoops. She politely encouraged other shoppers out of her way with a “Beep beep please!” and proudly showed her wares to the checkout lady. “Look, Gracie’s cerret. S’mine.” (For some reason, she pronounces the word “carrot” more poshly than the Queen.) It all went wrong when we got to the car park and I had to empty her trolley. This upset her greatly and she ran off. Toddlers running on car-parks, I hope you’ll agree, is not a desired scenario and I BELLOWED at her to stop. “DANGEROUS Grace! Stay with Mummy!” She was swiftly picked up kicking and screaming and wrestled into the car seat.