Well Gracie Girl, the holidays are drawing to a close and our extra time together has been . . . insightful. Lovely, cuddle-filled, puddle-splashingly, tantrum-throwingly delightful . . . but insightful. Certain things have come to my attention. Odd habits and wonderfully childish eccentricities have presented themselves over the past few weeks, so here are a few pointers/words of advice about some stuff we could maybe work on?
- It’s lovely – LOVELY – that you are so fond of animals. But perhaps the snail obsession could be toned down? Just a little? We don’t always have to find one to ride with us in your Smart-Trike cup holder when out and about. They honestly don’t like having baths in your water tray, and not every baby snail has to be named “Gracie Snail.” Also sweetheart – please remember that not all of your friends share this deeply felt mollusc love, and if they are crying and running away from you, then they probably don’t want to be friends with the snail.
- Bedtime stories are no longer quite they ordeal they used to be (see here for a reminder) but are now a lovely snuggly, gentle shared experience that bring peace and calm to the end of the day. However, the vice like headlock that you administer immediately afterwards in an attempt to get me to stay in bed with you is not as endearing. I am now straining muscles in my contortionist-like attempts to break free of them, and they really need to stop, Grace.
- The number 16 does exist. Your counting is superb for your age, but whatever your beef is with the number 16 – it will have to be addressed.
- You need to stop getting upset if Daddy trumps and forgets to say “pull my finger.” I shall also be speaking to Daddy about this.
- Tampons are NOT sweeties.
- Mummy is using a sieve – not “catching carrots” in her “net.” Whilst I feel a pride in the fact that this reflects the many happy hours spent rock-pooling at the seaside, it had also made me re-think how often you see me cooking fresh vegetables, and I hereby resolve to increase the frequency.
That’s all for now my little ball of madness. You’re like a firework dropped on the floor, Grace: Beautiful and fizzing and sparkling, flying in every direction, a liability and a huge excitement. One day you’ll shoot away into the sky and show the whole world your beautiful colours. Till then, stay strange little one. Love ya X