Ode To The Blogger

Ode to The Blogger
A blogger is a writer,
First and foremost, this is so.
A master of the written word,
A mummy in-the-know.
We’re clever and impassioned,
We’ve a canny way with words,
We write the things that interest us,
We’re longing to be heard.

And yet, for me, the blogging world’s
Becoming too elusive,
The groups and chats are forums
Somewhat complex and exclusive:
I know not what a “plug in” is,
“Self Hosted” is a mystery.
The techno world is prevalent,
The fountain pen, but history.

Would Plath or Wolf or Austin
Have reviewed the latest slinky?
Would Atwood, or Du Maurier
Do carnivals or linkys?
“To be or not to be” it seems no longer is the question,
“To follow or no-follow”
Is instead the new obsession.
HTML – what the F**K? I haven’t got a clue!
And even leaving comments has become a right to-do.

ENOUGH! Say I, I’m sinking,
In a world of techno babble.
A word is not a proper word
Unless it counts in scrabble.
So take you “codes” and “badges”,
Take your “pingbacks” and your “themes”,
Take you “widgets”, “stats” and “templates”
And your FRIGGING “RSS FEEDS”??!

I haven’t got the foggiest,
I know not what they mean.
I officially declare,
That all thing’s techy aint my scene.
I’ll just crash on with writing,
Cause the rest seems just a farce,

So you can keep your techno jargon
And shove it up your . . .

. . . ULRs.

Love Minty x

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31 Comments

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31 responses to “Ode To The Blogger

  1. Hahahahaha! Love it. Totally agree.
    xx

  2. I cannot even begin to tell you how much I ADORE this poem. I’m sitting at my desk beaming like a loon and in total awe of you right now.

  3. Best blog post I’ve read – EVER!!!! Brilliant!!

    CJ x

  4. Printed and pinned on my wall as I draft my latest post with a pen to type up once I am ready!

  5. Absolutely brilliant! Love it! 😀

  6. I LOVE this – it almost made me cry with relief! Well done you :))

  7. This is brilliant! Might have to do a Margaret Atwood themed linky!

  8. Brilliant!!!! I’m sooo with you on the techno stuff and everything else for that matter> That brought a proper smile to my face 🙂

  9. Nickie-Typecast

    This. Is. Ace!

  10. Spot on – this is the dogs bollocks, I’m printing it out and hanging it up so I can read it next time my laptop tells me some plug-in I didn’t even know I had has crashed…

  11. Love it – brilliant post!!

  12. Heehee, now I need to learn to write 😉 xxx

  13. StephsTwoGirls

    What a brilliant natural talent you have! Does it just flow, or did that take you ages?! And do you write it down first and type it up after??!! Loved it x

    • This kind of sing-songy rhymic poem has always come pretty easily to be honest. Took about 10/15 mins start to finish and typed it straight as a post. God, do I sound like a right arse now? (Maybe I should start a poetry blog! haha.)And thank you btw x

  14. I can’t say I agree with ALL of it (as I run a linky) but I agree about the ridiculousness of all the technicalities! There’s just too much analysis.

  15. Love this, love writing …. isn’t that what it is really all about? Thanks for this, it made me smile xx

  16. I love poems and I love this one! You hit the nail on the head!

  17. Pingback: Top 5 Funniest Blog Posts | waterbirthplease

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